Writing

Miracles

Miracles are a difficult thing for me to talk about these days. I believe in miracles. I watched miracles happen when my kids were born and when I gave birth to someone else’s baby. I see people talking about praying for a miracle. I see people saying that their prayers are working so keep praying…

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Intensity and anticipation

Recently, I have been very reflective about my grief journey. Thus far, it sometimes surprises me just how intensely I feel everything. If I get angry about something, I get very angry. When I find joy, it is intense joy. When there is am injustice, I want to right it, if at all possible. I’ve…

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Trying to get through

The holidays. I’ve always enjoyed the holidays. I’ve never gone over the top with any of it but it has always been enjoyable. Now that our son us died, I am not enjoying myself one bit. I am not going out of my way to go see Christmas lights, I’m really avoiding the stores and…

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“How are you doing?”

Please don’t take offense to this because I realize that this is a very simple question that EVERYONE asks but I have come to HATE this question. I started hating it while our son was in the hospital. At that time, I didn’t know which end was up and I was getting by on sheer…

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Childhood Cancer is NOT rare

I’ve heard it said so many times that childhood cancer is rare and I don’t think that is true. It’s definitely not rare to me now that my son died of cancer. I knew of one other child that died of cancer and another one who survived it before I was involved with St. Baldrick’s.…

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